Understanding the Batterer in Custody and Visitation Disputes/Lundy Bancroft
“A batterer also tends to involve his children in the abuse of the mother. He may require the children to report on the victim’s activities during the day, degrade or humiliate her in front of them, or persuade them that she deserves to be abused. He may even involve them directly in abusing her; for example, a client of mine taught his two-year-old to call the mother “Mommy b***.” He may be cruel to the children as a way of getting at her; one of my clients had cut up his daughter’s prom dress with scissors one night while angry at his wife. He may do them special favors after abusing the mother, to get the children on his side. He may tell them that their mother doesn’t love them. He may threaten to take the children away from her, legally or illegally…” Lundy Bancroft, Understanding the Batterer in Custody and Visitation Disputes (1998).