Protective Mothers' Alliance International

family court abuse/corruption

DV BY PROXY- From an Adult Child’s Perspective

with 3 comments

Disclaimer:

As PMA International has posted before, we prefer the term DV by Proxy to explain the manipulations an abuser parent uses to teach the child to reject the protective parent. We prefer this term because;
1. In our opinion ,it more accurately depicts the actions taken by the abuser parent towards the child
2 There has been a lot of misinformation about parental alienation circulating the internet and beyond.

3.The term parental alienation and /or parental alienation syndrome has been use as a legal defense for abusive dads in family court. Most often this term has been used by the attorneys of dads who sexual abuse their children. This legal defense is used – most often- by attorneys in family court , for the purpose of deflecting blame from the criminal actions of their client onto the protective mother.

4 The result of the above has frequently been, abusers winning custody due to this misuse of the term. 
Because the term is so emotionally charged for protective mothers, and for all the reasons above, we feel DV by Proxy is a better choice. Please keep in mind others still use the term Parental Alienation. Since PMA International did not author this piece, the term parental alienation or alienation may be used.

The below is a story about an adult survivor of DV By Proxy. Although many Protective Mothers sadly are estranged from their children due to DV By Proxy, this particular adult survivor was estranged from his father by his mother. Please keep an open mind about the terminology used, along with the gender of the perpetrator. DV by Proxy is abuse ,and those that suffer from this are in great pain and deeply affected . Abusive behavior is not gender specific. This adult survivor’s wonderful series of videos is very educational. He goes into great detail about the manipulations he suffered at the hands of his abuser, showing step by step how a child can be brainwashed and taught to hate their loving parent.

****Trigger Warning****
This video is about DV by Proxy. Those who have lived through DV by Proxy, might be triggered by viewing it’s content. Please be advised and take steps to get the support and healing you need.

Written by protectivemothersallianceinternational

January 9, 2015 at 8:17 am

3 Responses

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  1. Ryan”s video is so very accurate. And in my case of complete alienation, the story I was fed was “look how we are here for you while your bad parent has abandoned you”.

    mothererased

    January 9, 2015 at 2:20 pm

  2. I am curious as to how Ryan and other adult children of alienation or dv by proxy have dealt with their relationships with the alienating parent. This is something I continue to struggle with even as I am writing my memoir.

    mothererased

    January 9, 2015 at 2:38 pm

  3. Excellent! TY PMA 4 all u do!

    Janey

    January 10, 2015 at 6:34 am


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