Archive for the ‘divorce’ Category
Asheville, N.C., Sept. 9, 2016 – Seth Willis Pickering stabbed his 6-year old daughter Lila to death in front of two park rangers along the Blue Ridge Parkway. When arrested, he said, “Now they will never be able to take her away from me.. She’s happier now.. it’s what she wanted.”
Pickering was involved in a custody dispute with ex-wife Ashley Pickering. Ashley left the relationship because he was abusive towards her. Ashley, who now lives in Florida, was fighting in the courts for the return of her daughter, “I went to leave and a cop was supposed to send Lila with me, and he didn’t, and I’ve been fighting with the courts and DSS.” Ashley claims that Lila was soon to return to her care.
Lila was placed in protective custody with the Buncombe County Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) after being removed from her father’s care, due to his violent behavior towards another woman. Lila was placed with a local family, who she knew well. The family offered to take the child in to avoid foster care. Pickering was allowed supervised visitation.
On September 9th, Lila was picked up at the home by her father, without permission, and taken to a remote camp site. Park rangers discovered Pickering with Lila, and before they could intervene, he has stabbed her to death.
Pickering is charged with first degree murder.
Lila Pickering is described as being a happy child with a beautiful smile who nickname was “Rescue Ranger” because she was willing to help anybody. Lila would have celebrated her birthday on October 1st, there will be a celebration of her life at the local elementary school where she attended. A Go Fund Me has been created by the family to help raise money for funeral expenses.
Cindy Dabil, Lila’s grandmother says Child Protective Services in Florida and in North Carolina should have done more to protect Lila. She hopes Lila’s tragic death will serve as a call to action to better protect children from abuse, and to make changes to improve the safety of children living in state care
To the children alienated from a Protective Parent, we wish to speak to your hearts.
Remember what it was like to be with your loving parent. Remember the fun.
Remember how you were loved. All the little ways and all the big ways your parent showed you how much they cared.
Remember, and never forget.
Reach out to that loving parent today. Let them know you remember. Let them know you appreciate their love .
Love them back.
The PMA International Team.
What Does a Severely Alienated Child look like?
Copyright 1998 by Douglas Darnall, Ph.D.
The child has a relentless hatred for towards the targeted parent.
The child parrots the Obsessed Alienator, and makes statements against the targeted parent.
The child does not want to visit or spend any time with the targeted parent.
Many of the child’s beliefs are enmeshed with the alienator.
The child’s stated beliefs are delusional and frequently irrational.
The child is not intimidated by the court.
Frequently, the child’s reasons are not based on personal experiences with the targeted parent. Instead, the reasons reflect what the child is told by the Obsessed Alienator.The child has difficulty making any differentiation between the two.
The child has no ambivalence in his feelings; it’s all hatred, with no ability to see the good. (Black and White thinking)
The child has no capacity to feel guilty about how he or she behaves toward the targeted parent; The child cannot forgive any past indiscretions or parenting mistakes.
The child shares the Obsessed Alienator’s cause. Together, they are in lockstep to denigrate the hated parent.
The child’s obsessional hatred extends to the targeted parent’s extended family without any guilt or remorse.
The child can appear like any other normal and healthy child — until asked about the targeted parent, which then triggers the child’s hatred.
* For more information about alienated children,see ‘Divorce Casualties: Protecting Your Children From Parental Alienating’, Dr.Douglas (Doug) Darnall Ph.D.
‘Why Didn’t You Just Leave?’ / Six Domestic Violence Survivors Explain Why It’s Never That Simple/ Huffington Post
****Caution May Trigger****
It’s the question every survivor of domestic violence is posed, often incredulously: Why didn’t you just leave? The reality is that leaving an abusive relationship is often a herculean task that endangers the woman and calls for resources that aren’t readily available.
In June, after The Huffington Post ran an investigative report on a woman allegedly murdered by her boyfriend, we received an outpouring of responses from domestic violence survivors who wanted to explain why they had stayed with their abusers. We spent the next three months interviewing these women. While they offered hundreds of reasons, ranging from the logistical to the deeply personal, some common themes emerged: Fear. Love. Family. Money. Shame. Isolation.
In this series, you will hear from six survivors of domestic violence about why they didn’t leave sooner. The stories — told in their own words — are as distinct as they are similar. One woman suffered a brutal week of abuse before fleeing. Others stayed for decades trying to make things work. Two women were shot, the bullets narrowly missing their hearts. Another endured years of incessant stalking.
This week, stories like theirs became part of a national conversation when a video surfaced of pro football player Ray Rice violently punching his then-fiancee Janay Palmer in an elevator. Palmer, who married Rice just a few weeks after the incident, was criticized for having stayed with him. Then, something remarkable happened: Writer Beverly Gooden shared her own reasons for staying in an abusive relationship on Twitter, using the hashtag #WhyIStayed. Within hours, hundreds of survivors were tweeting their own reasons for doing the same.
As the stories continue to flood in, we hope this project will make it clear that “just leaving” often isn’t an option. We hope these accounts will prompt people to stop asking why she stayed — and instead begin asking how they can help.
These stories include descriptions of extreme violence and sexual assault and may be distressing for some readers.
Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for the National Domestic Violence Hotline.