Archive for the ‘E.J Perth PMA INTL. U.S.A Regional Director’ Category
(Atlanta, Georgia, July 2016) – Propser Ortega is recovering from horrific torture, rape and assault inflicted on her by her husband, Aaron Uchitel. Prosper was rescued by her mother, Fawn Ortega, who grew concerned after not hearing from Prosper, and fought to get inside the house. She was close to death when Fawn rescued her, and her newborn.
Fawn says, “Her ribs are broken. He beat her ribs and breast saying her milk was useless and she was worthless. He tried to blind her so she couldn’t see her baby, he tried to make her deaf so she couldn’t hear him crying for her.” Aaron Uchitel has been charged with aggravated battery, false imprisonment and cruelty to children.
Fawn, and other family members, are sharing Prosper’s story in order to raise awareness abut domestic violence. The family has created a GoFundMe to raise money for hospital bills and other expenses.
Updates on Prosper’s recovery can also be found on the GoFundMe page. An update posted 4 months ago on Prosper’s recovery offers this touching message of hope: “We just keep rolling along – I don’t know what else to say other than that. Every day is another step towards some type of normalcy but normal still seems very far away. Despite that, we have beautiful people offering goodness in abundance, and that makes it worlds better…”
Asheville, N.C., Sept. 9, 2016 – Seth Willis Pickering stabbed his 6-year old daughter Lila to death in front of two park rangers along the Blue Ridge Parkway. When arrested, he said, “Now they will never be able to take her away from me.. She’s happier now.. it’s what she wanted.”
Pickering was involved in a custody dispute with ex-wife Ashley Pickering. Ashley left the relationship because he was abusive towards her. Ashley, who now lives in Florida, was fighting in the courts for the return of her daughter, “I went to leave and a cop was supposed to send Lila with me, and he didn’t, and I’ve been fighting with the courts and DSS.” Ashley claims that Lila was soon to return to her care.
Lila was placed in protective custody with the Buncombe County Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) after being removed from her father’s care, due to his violent behavior towards another woman. Lila was placed with a local family, who she knew well. The family offered to take the child in to avoid foster care. Pickering was allowed supervised visitation.
On September 9th, Lila was picked up at the home by her father, without permission, and taken to a remote camp site. Park rangers discovered Pickering with Lila, and before they could intervene, he has stabbed her to death.
Pickering is charged with first degree murder.
Lila Pickering is described as being a happy child with a beautiful smile who nickname was “Rescue Ranger” because she was willing to help anybody. Lila would have celebrated her birthday on October 1st, there will be a celebration of her life at the local elementary school where she attended. A Go Fund Me has been created by the family to help raise money for funeral expenses.
Cindy Dabil, Lila’s grandmother says Child Protective Services in Florida and in North Carolina should have done more to protect Lila. She hopes Lila’s tragic death will serve as a call to action to better protect children from abuse, and to make changes to improve the safety of children living in state care
“The mother has to comply with a court order and send her child to be alone with an abusive, violent man.
This is torture for her, and for the child, when they find themselves in a frightening situation, taken from their protector and forced into contact with a man, whom they may have witnessed seeing him beat their mother or who has been abusive to them.
This is abuse by Family Court.”
“Domestic Abuse by Proxy, Family Court Abuse: Failing to Protect Children and Mothers” is a powerful and informative video released on Youtube by Family Court Abuse (UK).
This video describes how abusive ex partners will use the family court system, and manipulate the legal process, to gain control, and inflict further harm of their victims. Abusers also seek custody to cause the most damage to a former partner; by attacking her love, and maternal bond, with her child. An abuser attacks by taking a child away from their mother, and destroying their relationship. Children are also used as pawns by an abuser in other ways designed to terrorize, hurt and harass their victim.
The legal system is a minefield for an abused woman.The process of how the family court system can perpetrate and enable domestic violence to continue is also described in this video. Family court judges and professionals often lack training in domestic violence, and do not recognize the abuse. Or, the judge and professionals have been so indoctrinated in parental alienation theories, and other prejudices, that they mistake signs of abuse for parental alienation syndrome and discredit legitimate concerns. Or see the mother’s attempts to get help as a sign that something is “wrong” with her. Domestic abuse advocates and experts are rarely consulted by the court system, and a judge has the discretion to disallow or ignore evidence presented by a mother (evidence of abuse, and expert testimony is commonly discredited by judges after a mother has been falsely labelled). Obtaining legal representation is also difficult, most women go to court without an attorney because they can not afford one. An abuser with an attorney has a powerful advantage over her, and gains an ally in the legal system.
The lives of children are also endangered when Courts work to give an identified abuse custody and/or unsupervised visits. The video mentions that the Courts order “more contact than would be usual, to enable the child and father to ‘quickly establish a relationship’“. This means there is less scrutiny, and less care given to how these decisions are being made, and the effect on the child involved.
This video will be familiar to those who have experienced family court, and offers validation to what you have endured. It is also a powerful teaching tool to educate, and raise awareness, of how the family court process fails to protect victims of domestic violence and their children.
Note: The end of the video offers suggestions on how to raise awareness of family court injustices by using social media as a platform. PMA International does not offer legal advice or professional services. Reposting this video does not constitute advice or suggestion of any kind. Please use discretion, and take reasonable care, when making decisions. If you need help or legal assistance, please contact a qualified professional and/or organization.
December 2014, Orlando, Florida: 13 year Gregory Jean Jr. is returned to his mother after being kidnapped, and hidden behind a fake wall. He was missing for 4 agonizing years.
Father, Gregory Jean Sr. and step-mother, Samantha Davis are accused of kidnapping Gregory Jean Jr. from his mother, who had custody, when he went to visit them near Atlanta.
Gregory Jean Sr. and Samantha Joy Davis. (Source: American Urban Radio Networks, http://www.aurn.com1)
Gregory Jean Jr. was abused and hidden behind a fake wall. He was given a cell phone to contact friends, and only allowed to talk to his mother after being coached on what to say. Jean Jr. then gained the courage to use that phone to contact his mother, and alert police to rescue him.
Gregory Jean Sr. and Samantha Joy Davis face charges of child cruelty, false imprisonment and obstruction.
What Does The Quote That “58,000 Children Are Sent to Live With Abusers Every Year” Mean? / E.J Perth U.S.A Regional Director , Healing and Prayer Administrator- PMA International
By E.J Perth
What does the quote that “58,000 children are sent to live with abusers every year” mean?
Actual Quote: “According to a conservative estimate by experts at the Leadership Council on Child Abuse and Interpersonal Violence (LC), more than 58,000 children a year are ordered into unsupervised contact with physically or sexually abusive parents following divorce in the United States. This is over twice the yearly rate of new cases of childhood cancer.”
This number is an estimate, the link below explains how the LC came to that number in 2008. I have not seen current numbers.
CONTACT is explained as ,”This number includes BOTH those who are left in the sole care of an abuser and those who are required to have unsupervised visits.
“The LC admits they used estimates because there was a lack of information in certain areas.
The LCl says courts often fail to detect family violence so children’s lives are put into danger, “Once placed with an abusive parent or forced to visit, children will continue to be exposed to parental violence and abuse until they reach 18. Thus, we estimate that half a million children will be affected in the US at any point of time. Many of these children will suffer physical and psychological damage which may take a lifetime to heal.”
WE NEED UPDATED studies and evaluations to get current information, and be able to analyze trends in family courts, and what its failures are today. Updated info will also help determine how interventions in family court are working.
Common Responses After Losing a Child (for Protective Moms)/ E. J Perth PMA INTL. USA Regional Director, Healing & Prayer Network Administrator
I feel it is important to distinguish the loss and being related to family court proceedings because often times the process involves factors that re-traumatize the family and prolong any possibility of stabilizing the family. In essence, there is a distinct type of grief that follows losing a child due to unjust proceedings that villify a parent trying to protect their children.
Mothers who loose their children in family court proceedings often experience (and report):
* Character assassination and/or emotional abuse of the mother (who may be labelled as having “Parental Alienation Syndrome” or “Malicious Mom Syndrome”)
* Minimizing past abuse and its affects/Minimizing the current danger
* Legal proceedings that deny a mother of her legal rights
* Feeling threatened or coerced by court personnel
*Expensive legal or court costs, often resulting in severe financial hardship (I have heard of mothers losing their home and being forced to work several jobs, in which their contact with their children becomes even more limited)
* Inability to protect children combined with valid concerns the children may still be in danger
* Children forcibly removed from the home (a majority of these mothers were primary caregivers)
* Mothers denied contact with children–these children are oftn abruptly, and without warning removed from their homes, their community, their friends and any connection to the mother
* Mothers being compelled into supervised visitation to see children, and may be exposed to other abusers (I have actually heard of a woman who took the bus to supervised visitation, and was stalked by an alleged abuser when leaving the premisis)
* Inability to get help or support for herself. Mothers may have their medical and psychological records subpoened by the court and/or their abuser, in which she degraded or labelled based on the findings and then forced to “prove” she is a fit mother. Mothers may also become isolated because they feel others do not understand their situation. It is common for people to feel overwhelmed hearing these stories and then to be unable to provide support. The financial depletion caused by family court may also limit a woman’s ability to seek help. Not to mention the woman may be so overwhelmed that she does not have the energy to get the help she may need.
* DV by Proxy ; the abuser manipulating the children, or using them in ways to hurt, intimidate or harass the mother (Ie using children to send messages to the mother, telling the children false information about the mother, threatening to harm the children, threatening to take the children, etc..)
Mothers who loose their children in this way often experience:
* Physical Illness (including but not limited to headaches, ulcers, vomiting, fatigue and exhaustion)
* Anxiety/Panic Attacks
* Guilt/Shame/ Self-Blame, particularly around issues that they failed or could not protect their children
* Flashbacks (The court proceedings may trigger memories of abuse, or legitimate fears)
* Binge Eating and/or Lack of Appetite, Nausea
* Shock (A combination of all these factors, feeling numb, unable to perform daily tasks, feeling as if she is living in a fog, lack of memory/concentration, tremors/trembling, hot flashes etc)
* A surge of emotion/adrenaline
* Post Traumatic Stress
* Avoidance (Especially around areas that remind them of their children. It would be common to even avoid social places and friends)
* Fits of Crying — There are often triggers. (When I lost my child, I remember avoiding the grocery store because I would pass my child’s favorite treats, think of my child, and start to cry. It got to the point where I could not even remember what I wanted in the grocery store because I was so upset.)
* Memory Loss/Concentration Difficulties
THIS DOES NOT MEAN THE MOTHER IS MENTALLY ILL OR UNSTABLE, these are typical responses to the loss of a child in combination with the extreme stress of being involved in family court proceedings that are perceived as unjust, and which a mother has no control over. It takes time to work through the grief and emotions of losing your child, and being involved in family court proceedings–these response may emerge and change as the mother processes what has happened.
I found it helpful to be part of a domestic violence group, hosted by a battered women’s shelter. The group is confidential and does not keep records. I was able to talk with other women and learn tools on how to cope, and rebuild my life. There is hope–Stay strong.
Blessings ~ EJ Perth, PMA Intl.USA Regional Director, Healing & Prayer Network Administrator
If you have anything to add to this list, please add a comment. Please keep remain respectful. Any derogatory language will be deleted. Remember PMA is a NO ABUSE ZONE! Thank you for keep it friendly 🙂