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Happy Passover From Everyone at PMA International to You and Yours.

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Love to all Protective Mothers this Easter/ Passover From PMA International; WE Shall Overcome!

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This is for all the Protective Mothers with empty arms and hurting hearts who are missing their children every second of every day, but who are deeply hurting today – Easter and Passover. Know that no matter what, you ARE your children’s mother. No one -and certainly no court- can take away this God-given role in your children’s lives. Please know this in your heart. PMA INTL loves and supports you and your precious children now and forever.

” We shall Overcome”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnzmPrsLXn8&list=FL7KCZ-5dkBZg_NNHCzwZnyA&index=6

Minors Counsel; Plunder The Booty / Desperate Exes

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http://desperateexes.com/2009/08/24/argh-minors-counsels-plunder-the-booty/

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Have you felt the “hum” at the Stanley Mosk Courthouse? Yeah, it is the “hum” of people talking about “MINOR’S COUNSEL,” aka, “I have a fast boat and a flag with a skull and crossbones, lets take a cruise.” Several lawyers who I respect have mentioned this to me and I too have noticed the power these attorneys have in the capacity of being appointed by the courts as “minors counsel.” You would almost expect them to show up looking a little grandmotherly or a little fatherly. I am actually a little taken aback that they don’t come to court wearing a patch over one eye and a parrot on the shoulder. All the more that makes one wonder what is the actual purpose of these lawyers who get these real lucrative gigs working with kids? Kids who, by the way, under any sense of normalcy would never see a psychologist , or a counselor (unless at school) or for that matter their own attorney, to protect their rights to see if Sunday is better than Saturday for an “overnight,” or that mom cannot fry an egg, or dad does not seem to know how to operate the washer or the dryer. But now they have the misfortune to have two parents who are getting divorced and thus they have their very own Minor’s Counsel…or is it “Miner’s Counsel”…LMAO, I just had a vision of a bearded guy with a shovel digging in a mine and bringing gold ore to the surface.

Folks if you happen to be in court one day and the judge mentions “minor’s counsel,” you too may want to hum “IT TAKES A WORRIED MAN TO SING A WORRIED SONG”. Do not get me wrong here folks, I too was a court appointed investigator many years ago and made a fortune, oops I meant to say a comfortable living, being appointed to represent people who had been arrested, and worked on their defense. It was great, the cops arrested them, the D.A. prosecuted them and I got to defend them, all being paid for by the county (not L.A. by the way…I never thought that the tax payer ever really got it)! It was great!

Back to “miners counsel.” It has been reported that one lawyer who represented a celebrity who had to stop constantly to get coffee and smokes got paid in excess of $400,000 dollars to represent two kids that couldn’t say “poop,“ and there is another one that has made in excess of $100,000 — for what exactly no one can figure out for sure. Now, what I just wrote is for those of you with MONEY and what a gift it is to be appointed by a judge to one of these cases, famous rich people!!! Cha Ching. They will show up for every hearing, every interview I am sure they would not miss even your kid’s bris, this for all my goyim readers is a circumcision. Now for all of you who are wondering about the working class and the poor well you could be ordered to pay half or NO PROBLEM, the county will pay “Da Miner” $125 an hour, and no cap! Take the kid to dinner and a movie and “bill baby,bill.” This is great money, as many of these people could not present a case in court if their life depended on it…not all, but many. So this is great, it is a little like a guy who goes to school to fix cars, he can’t fix crap, so he just moves the cars for the mechanics to fix, very similar.

And wait till you see these “protectors of the children” make there orations in the court room….OMG, this is not funny and can kill your chances of making any headway in your divorce. And most judges that I have observed give these “Miners” free rein to run one or the other or both parents right into the ground. For all my cat lovers, ever notice when your cat drops a smelly one in her kitty litter, well the burying action is very similar to what minor’s counsel can do to whatever position you thought you had in your divorce. And I have seen a few instances of that, “look judge what a great job I did,” did very much appear to me to be a bit over the top…way over the top. And quite frankly are all of these appointees thinking clearly? One or two I have seen appear, how do I put this delicately, NUTS!

Moms and Dads, god help you if your kid is smart enough to play a game on their sometimes overzealous lawyer aka “Minor’s Counsel,“ Oh No Mr. Bill! What real expertise do these people have to deal with children and to interpret what they say and do? Let’s see, a JD degree and a class to be qualified to deal with the children of people going through a divorce, and POOF! it is “show me the money!” My opinion, for the most part this is an appointment with too many flaws. That is the truth, they take a class to get appointed to the panel, LMAO for a few this has been the equivalent of winning the lottery! I ran a juvenile division for a couple of years and I know juveniles and this minor’s counsel thing has to be one of the best gravy trains I have seen in years.

“Mother”- Lita Ford

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This is for all the Protective Mothers with empty arms and hurting hearts who are missing their children every second of every day, but who are deeply hurting tonight , in light of the upcoming Holidays. Know that no matter what, you ARE your children’s mother. No one -and certainly no court- can take away this God-given role in your children’s lives. Please know this in your heart. PMA INTL loves and supports you and your precious children, now and forever.
This songs’ story;
“Mother” is based of Lita Ford’s experience with DV By Proxy, something she dealt with firsthand when she went through her divorce from now ex-husband Jim Gillette. Ford’s has two sons, James (16,) and Rocco 12,) who she has not seen since the divorce, and has told Decibel:
“My kids are with their dad. He brainwashed them and took them from me, telling them, ‘Oh, you don’t want to go with Mommy. Mommy’s bad.’ He put the entire weight of the divorce on my kids, which is the worst thing any parent could do to their child. It’s like losing your child to some sort of freak, like in the mall, or somebody hanging out in bushes or at a bus stop. You hear all these horror stories. Only, I know where they are – that’s the only difference.”
She hopes the track and video will reach her sons, but says:
“He won’t let them hear it. He won’t let them have anything to do with me. He won’t let them look at any photographs. It’s the worst thing that’s ever happened in my life. I wrote this song to tell them how much I love them, that I didn’t mean for this to happen and it’s not my fault. I didn’t do this to them – although they think I did.”
Mother – Lita Ford

PMA International’s Official Response to Various Misunderstandings About PMA

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Dear Protective Mothers, Advocates, and Supporters;

We have recently been made aware of some comments on the internet involving PMA International , and we wish to respond. PMA International is issuing this statement to address misunderstandings about PMA, and to continue expressing our support to those struggling with family court abuse, corruption, and DV by Proxy issues.

Statement 1:
PMA International refuses to acknowledge that mothers and women can also be abusers.

PMA International Responds:

PMA INTL is very clear about this issue, which has been addressed on our blog and website describing our No Abuse Zone Policy . See below

“PMA International recognizes that there are different types of abuse and abusers are not gender specific”

For the rest of our No Abuse Zone Policy please visit:
https://protectivemothersalliance.wordpress.com/2014/03/28/pma-internationals-no-abuse-zone-policy/

Statement 2:

There is” bickering, ” “in fighting”,” arguing” and “war” in the Mother’s Movement between PMA, Lundy Bancroft, Janice Levinson, and AMPP/ Claudine Dombrowski. It’s been stated that what is happening between the two organizations is a “turf war” or one organization excoriating the other. This statement has also been addressed on our blog ( see below)

PMA Responds:
PMA INTL has been under attack for 4 years by Claudine Dombrowski, and AMPP . The nature of these attack includes cyberstalking, identity theft, threatening the life of the Executive Director Janice Levinson and is clearly the dynamic of an abuser stalking it’s victim.

“PMA INTL wants to be very clear that there is no” bickering, ” “in fighting”,” arguing” “war” or any other word that might imply mutuality about this AMPP issue. This is a common misconception about this sad situation. This is a very clear case of abuser and target This is the epitome of cyber bullying. PMA never responds in kind to these attacks, PMA in no way initiates these attacks. Understand these attacks have been going on for four years. PMA does not create hate sights targeting protective mothers, for abuse. This is a VERY IMPORTANT distinction that must be made.”

For the rest of this official PMA INTL.statement please visit;

https://protectivemothersalliance.wordpress.com/2013/07/31/the-mothers-movements-dirty-little-secret-abusers-within/

To see Lundy Bancroft’s response to the above attacks please visit;

https://protectivemothersalliance.wordpress.com/2013/07/31/lundy-bancroft-takes-a-strong-stand-against-abusers-within-the-mothers-movement/

In addition, is is very important to note that Claudine and AMPP have launched similar attacks on other protective mothers/advocates that are not PMA members or affiliated with PMA International. Because of PMA’s no abuse zone policy ( see above) we do not work with abusers, and thus do not work with AMPP or any of Claudine Dombrowski/ AMPP’s supporters or promoters.

Statement 3:
PMA INTL has been falsely accused of profiting off the Moms, these are statements made from both Claudine and from father’s rights organizations.

PMA INTL Responds:
PMA INTL is an all-volunteer grassroots organization. We do not get funding from any source. We do not charge membership fees. All of our events and projects are free of cost for anyone who wishes to join, and participate. We welcome all Protective Mothers and Supporters to be a PMA International Member/Supporter, for more information please visit: https://protectivemothersalliance.wordpress.com/protective-mothersadvocates-interested-in-joining-pma-international-the-process/

Statement 4:
It has been stated that PMA INTL believes all men are abusers.

PMA Responds:
Our co-founder is Lundy Bancroft, who has offered his male perspective as well as his professional expertise to our organization. We also have created a network called, Man Up for Moms (M.U.M.). M.U.M is headed by a male PMA International Administrator, Greg Sanders. Some of PMA Intl’s other networks include , adult children who are victims of family court abuse and DV by Proxy. This network is called Hear Us Now (H.U.N.) which is headed by Samantha Williams. A large number of PMA’s Administrators, State Leaders, International Leaders and Member/Supporters have sons—and we offer our love and support equally to our sons as we do to our daughters.

PMA INTL is not against fathers; we are against abusive fathers, just as we are against abusive mothers. This is the heart of our No Abuse Zone policy.

Although our specialty and mission statement is working with abused mothers, this not mean that we have an agenda against men, or that we are anti-father or that we are blind to the fact that women and mothers can be abusers too. Just like PMA Intl. understands, there are many organizations helping men but PMA International does not believe all those organizations hate women or are anti-mom; their specialty is just about helping men.

In our experience, there are many groups helping fathers but few helping abused mothers in family court. PMA INTL is an organization that consists of volunteer protective mothers and because of our experience, we saw a need, and decided to step up and help abused mothers and their children.

Statement 5
It has been stated that Lundy Bancroft is only involved in the Mother’s Movement for the money, and that he lacks qualifications to help moms.

PMA INTL. Responds:
Lundy has twenty years of experience specializing in interventions for abusive men and their families. He has also authored many book and scholarly articles. Most important Lundy is a former Co-Director of Emerge, the nation’s first counseling program for men who batter. He has worked with over a thousand abusers directly as an intervention counselor, and has served as clinical supervisor on another thousand cases. He has also served extensively as a custody evaluator, child abuse investigator, and expert witness in domestic violence and child abuse cases. Lundy appears across the United States as a presenter for judges and other court personnel, child protective workers, therapists, law enforcement officials, and other audiences. for more information about Lundy’s experience see below.

http://www.lundybancroft.com/

Thank you for your time, we appreciate your support. We look forward to continuing our work together for the sake of our children!

PMA International; a family of advocates.

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The Four Dysfunctional Family Roles / Lights Blog

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http://lightshouse.org/lights-blog/the-four-dysfunctional-family-roles#axzz2yYrEfEvS

The Four Basic Roles of Dysfunctional Families:
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Golden Child, Scapegoat, Mascot and Lost Child

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Dysfunctional families don’t allow people to be their authentic selves. They dance around their shame, denials and addictions, working to keep everyone in their assigned dysfunctional roles — like it or not.

There are four basic roles in the dysfunctional family:

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The Golden Child/Hero

The golden child is the one who “can do no wrong”. This child is viewed as being the best and the brightest; even if they’re not.
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Some golden children play the part well and end up stuck in the role of success-object, and some golden children are entitled troublemakers who are never expected to actually earn anything, due to their already-favored status. Golden children are expected to abandon their authentic selves in exchange for hollow esteem.

Many golden children wake up much later in life to a nice home, a fancy car, a high-paying job and a supposedly perfect family, all of which they suddenly realize they’d like to trade for something more authentic. Other golden children are the opposite; their lives are a mess because they’ve never had to work to earn their status, and the rest of the world doesn’t reward them similarly for doing nothing.

The Scapegoat

The scapegoat is the child who can “do no right”. This child is viewed as being the reason for everything undesirable and bad, even when they excel.

Some scapegoats enter into the trap of trying harder and harder to redeem themselves in the eyes of their family so they can finally be respected and appreciated for who they really are. They can never be good enough, and will burn themselves out trying to get a pat on the back. Other scapegoats succumb to the role of “bad one” and make waves, because they’re always labeled bad regardless, so they give up trying and rebel in anger.

Many scapegoats spend much of their adult lives still trying to be accepted and appreciated by constantly doing more, giving more and trying more. Other scapegoats spark lots of conflict and difficulties. Scapegoats typically wake up later in life and and realize things aren’t as they should be when their constant efforts to gain respect backfire and get them walked all over at work and at home (or when they get themselves into one too many conflicts pertaining to their adoption of a “who cares” attitude).

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The Lost Child

The Lost Child is the child who withdraws in self-preservation. Ignored and invisible, this child experiences loneliness and a feeling of not belonging.

Many Lost Children remain in the background into their adult lives, hiding from conflict and healthy risk-taking, stuck in the feeling of being a frightened outsider or unimportant “nobody”. Lost children typically wake up later in life to find that they have missed out on many emotional things others have had, such as a sense of connectedness and having made a difference in the world.

Often overlooked, many opportunities for better things have likely passed them by as they retreated into a quiet world which focused on something of value to them that was not likely related to confident interaction (and even conflict) with others. Some lost children take an interest in material possessions or other pursuits with limited social/intimate requirements.
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Mascot/Clown

The Mascot is the child who jokes and distracts the family from the heaviness of its dysfunction. This child expresses the effects of the family’s painful experiences as humor.

Mascots have difficulty accepting and expressing difficult feelings, and will joke their way out of serious circumstances, avoiding the real issue that needs addressing. Mascots may find themselves in entertainment-related fields, since it’s second nature for them to make light of tragedy, pain and suffering. Many mascots awaken later in life to find they have not been taken seriously, or are always counted on to make everyone feel better, perhaps at the expense of acknowledging their own painful realities.

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The Limitations of the concept of family roles

While helpful, the definitions of these roles are imperfect. Some sources claim there are more roles, as many as seven. Some sources claim the golden child/hero only plays the “perfect” role, though there are some golden children who are actually quite entitled, lazy and even antisocial. A similar issue exists with the definition of scapegoats. Some sources claim the scapegoat is “the bad seed”, and others say the scapegoat is the healthiest member of the family.

It’s also been noted that parents may change and mix the roles assigned to a given child based on changes in the family’s needs, experiences, environment and structure. This means it is possible for one child to be both the scapegoat and the lost child, etc., or start out as the golden child and tumble from grace to end up the scapegoat.

Ultimately, these definitions function more like helpful guidelines than scientific analysis, and have helped many people understand the fundamentals of dysfunctional family life.

More Here: http://lightshouse.org/lights-blog/the-four-dysfunctional-family-roles#ixzz2yYs5d5J4

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